Names, names, names. I never realized how difficult it could be to choose a name. I have many friends who have chosen all their children's names before they're even conceived. Unfortunately I'm not one of those people. I've most certainly thought about and written down my favorite boy and girl names, but when I think about actually naming a real person it becomes a little more complex. What if we pick (hypothetically) Frank, but he looks like a Fred? I suppose that a person "becomes" their name as they grow up. However, I know a lot of people who really don't look like their name. Also, Mike and I have very traditional names. I think it would be silly for us to try to come up with unique, unheard of, impossible to spell/pronounce, names for our children. I had a hard enough time getting people to pronounce Lanham correctly. I'm certainly grateful I didn't have to explain how to say Rachel too. I also really want to use family names, so our children know they were named after someone special, and their parents weren't just trying to be creative. Anyway...just my name thoughts these days. I obviously wish we had a definite name chosen, but I think I'd rather be able to be flexible. (wouldn't want to have his name on the wall and then have to change it)
So, Mike and I were in Burlington the other day and I saw a shirt that said,
"Yes, we have a name. No, we're not telling."
I reeeeeallllly wanted to get it. This seems to be the question that we're getting from everyone lately. Usually the conversation goes something like this....(Q-uestion, A-nswer, C-omment, R-esponse)
Q- When is your baby due?
A- July 25th (it was the 22nd....in case some of you were wondering)
C- Wow! You are really small to be that far along! (is this a compliment? I certainly don't feel small, and after hearing that at least once a day I'm starting to wonder if he's growing like he should be. Pregnant women don't want to be called small--not at 8 months pregnant.)
R-Thank you (????)
Q- So it is a boy or a girl
A- Boy
C- Oh! Boys are so much fun!
R- Yes, we're really excited!
Q- So do you have a name picked out? (here we go...)
A- We have a few that we're thinking of, but we'll probably wait to see him before we decide.
Q- What are the names your thinking of?
A- _______, ________, _________, _________ (I might end up telling if you really want to know...)
Then we get all sorts of responses....these are my favorite (and they also can be really irritating)
Oh, those are cute names! I like them! (thanks...even if you're lying)
I like _______ the best.
Interesting, ________ is a good name. (yes, that's why we like it)
Ewe! I don't like those. (mostly the responses of my siblings)
What about all the nicknames? (yes, we've thought about that)
You should name him _______ (he's OUR baby....)
Everyone will call him __________ (I know plenty of people who don't go by nicknames)
More often than not we get more negative responses than positive, which is really funny because we like very traditional names. Everyone is so opinionated. It's just funny. I can't imagine asking someone what they're going to name their child and then responding by saying "I don't like that." It's hard enough to choose a name without criticism from friends, family, and peers?
So, from now on, if you ask us what we're naming our child, our most common response will be:
"We Don't Know"
(and if we did, we wouldn't tell anyways)
yup, I know EXACTLY how you feel. We started telling people "no, we dont know" but then they start saying "you dont even have it narrowed down" or "not even a few?" then if you say no again, you have told TWO lies. Oh well, Heavenly Father understands.
ReplyDeleteHa ha! Those are classic conversations. Gotta love it! My father-in-law totally told us in front of the whole family that he thought the name we chose was stupid. STUPID? What parent says that? Some people can be ridiculous, but since you already know what to expect in a conversation it's good that you already have the responses down. I'm so excited for you guys!
ReplyDeleteoh man. i have to admit joey and i have our favorites, and i love to day dream and match them up in different ways. but i can imagine that it is much more difficult when he's there and waiting to know what you will call him! i had no idea people were so negative like that. how sad for them. i think the "i don't know" is a good response. and now i know to be more sensitive - just in case i haven't ever been! :) i'm sure whatever you choose it will fit.
ReplyDeleteHey Rachel-- I just had to comment because it seems like all of your posts these days mirror my thoughts exactly! It's hilarious in my head. I read and I think, "I know, right?" over and over. And definitely ditto on the name game. I can't even IMAGINE hearing someone's name choice and verbalizing anything negative about it, even if I hated it. We are lucky, for now, since we have the excuse that we don't know the sex yet, so we just tell people we will get serious about picking once we know. After that... who knows.
ReplyDeleteWe will probably use a lot of family names with our kids, whether first or middle. It just feels nice to have the name mean something more. Boo for made up names and random spellings that the kid will have to explain for the rest of his/her life. :) (No offense to any other readers...) So anyway. If you need someone to bounce names off of, I am across the lawn, and I know how you feel!
The joys of being pregnant! I loved it when people told me I looked small for how far along I was. Yes I worried until my doc visits when he would say they were growing just fine :) My first pregnancy I gain a WHOLE lot of weight, my last one I only gained 10 lbs (and I swear I was eating all the time). I would take it as a compliment, because there are those women out there who do look like they are carrying twins by 8 months along.
ReplyDeleteAnd for the name, I wouldn't worry to much. People will quickly come around. I remember when your mom told me she was naming you sister Eliza, and the first thought was....Oh my what an OLD sounding name, I can just see her with gray hair already. But after she was born I couldn't imagine her as anything else but Eliza.
Babies just tend to fit into what ever name they are given (be it traditional, unique or bizarre). Naming them after family is great also, kind of sentimental and gives them kind of a goal to be like the person they were named after. My kids all have middle names of someone important to both Darin and I.
So what are the names you have picked out?!?!?! (ha ha ha ha!) just kidding ;)
I am so with you on this one!! I learned after having my son that I just had to keep my mouth shut. I have this girl name that I LOVED and it was going to be my first daughters name. But a few people who heard it were so rude about it and it kind of ruined the name for me. So, sadly, we didn't name our daughter this particular name. Anyway, when I was pregnant with my daughter, my husband and I just started telling people that we had a few names picked out but that we weren't telling anybody. It sure annoyed a few people (particularly family members, who sadly enough, are the most open and rude about names sometimes). So, we didn't have to lie, but there was no way I was going to tell people after so many had already ruined a name for me even if it ticked a few people off. Anyway, good luck with picking a name!
ReplyDelete