The Waiting Game

4 days left, 4 days left. I honestly didn't think I'd have such a hard time waiting. 

Although, I probably wouldn't be having as hard of a time, except for these 7 reasons. 

1. Nearly all of the friends I have who were due in July (some due after me), have had their babies already. There are a couple still waiting with me...but who knows, they'll probably delivery before me too.

2. My doctor is NOT encouraging. In fact, if I based being able to EVER give birth to this baby, I probably never would, based on his estimations. I was dilated to a 1.5 on Monday, and he stripped my membranes at my request (the whole time kind of laughing and saying this probably won't do anything). The only thing he's really talked about is our scheduled induction date on August 2nd. There was no, "hopefully it'll be this week" or "good luck" or "hopefully we WON'T see you next Monday." But no, only a "since you're only dilated to a 1.5 we'll see what happens" and "we'll make an appointment for next Monday for another check up." Every woman is different! Not every woman will dilate to a 3 before starting real labor. Sometimes dilation won't start until labor begins. Ah, anyways, just had to vent. I guess he doesn't want to get anyone's hopes up.

3. Everyone is asking me if anything has happened yet. I get several texts and calls a day about it. If it were happening, we'd let people know. This has made me feel like I'm already late, which I'm not, and has made it harder to wait. Also, everyone has told me, "oh, this baby is going to come early." My mom never went past her due dates with any of her 8 children. That definitely made me think I'd be similar. Although...she also never got a stretch mark...and in the last 2 weeks I've sadly learned I'm not that lucky.

4. My whole pregnancy I have been convinced that I would deliver earlier than the 25th. The doctors moved my due date back a whole week based on small measurements, but if I were to go off of my last menstrual period I would have been further along. (I guess ovulation isn't always exactly in the middle of a cycle). It's hard though because I've always had a regular cycle...to the day, so I don't see how they could just move the date around like that. Although, it's not like them saying a day actually changes anything. Maybe they should start telling people their due dates are a week later than they should be. That way most women will deliver "early" and be much happier campers.

5. Last night I was almost positive I was starting real labor. My contractions started at 10:30pm and were regular until 5am. I couldn't sleep through it because of the back pain. I timed them for 2 different hours and both times the contractions were 1 min long and nearly 3-4 minutes apart. They were definitely too painful to sleep through, but I expected them to be more painful than they were. I called the hospital and explained the situation. The nurse said I should probably wait till they were very painful. But don't all women have different levels of pain tolerance? Well, at least we didn't rush to the hospital just to be sent back home.

6. I really want to have more than 4 weeks to recover and spend time with my baby before working again. BYU starts the last week of August, and even though I'll only be teaching for 2-3 hours a day, I still want time before it starts. Every day that passes is another full day I won't get to spend with my baby.

7. My birthday is July 28th. That's only 3 days after baby's due day. For my son's sake I REALLY hope he doesn't come on my birthday. What little boy wants to have his mom's birthday? Obviously I can get over it as long as he's here and healthy, but, although it sounds silly, I also like having my own special day. . . even though birthdays lose their excitement with age.

The funny thing is that I really don't want to rush this time. I like being able to take random naps, run quick easy errands, stay up late watching movies with my husband, sleep all night. I know life is going to change drastically in the next few days, but the anticipation is hard. I'm ready to meet our little boy, but I also know he'll come when he's ready. It's been so fun to see Mike get excited. He's been so supportive these last few days. I can't wait to see him with our baby. He is going to be such a great dad.

At least I feel prepared and much more calm than I did a week ago. I'm grateful to have had a little more time.

Baby Kitto, we love you, and we are so grateful to have had a healthy, complication-free pregnancy. We can't wait to meet you. Be safe in there! We hope you'll come soon!

Love, Mom and Dad