Sitting on a Saturday

Please forgive my fragmented sentences. I just need to write some thoughts. Thanks.

It's Saturday, and rain is in the forecast. I can't help feeling a little gloomy. Mike's new job is great, but it's taking almost all of his "off-time" to study for licensing tests. I miss him. Do you every have days where you feel very non-creative? I want to think of great things for Curtis and me to do today, but sometimes I just run out of ideas. There's just not a whole lot to "do" with a 10 month old. We can play, read (except he will NOT sit still in my lab), play hide-and-seek, take a walk, eat, nap, repeat. Oh, and I can't forget the million times I have to chase him down to get him out of trouble. 

Man, I'd sure love to take a dance class or something. 

On a different note, the world is depressing me. I can hardly stand to watch the news these days. There are such horrible things going on out there. Do any of you watch American Idol? I may have to stop. Well, at least I should probably stop watching the results shows. The performers they get to come on the show make me sick. J-Lo seems so sweet, but why must she be all about seduction and sensuality. Steven Tyler is a breath of fresh air to the show, but his music video made me change the channel. Jordin Sparks used to be so sweet. Why does she have to be seductive now? Lady Gaga. No words can adequately describe how disturbed it makes me to see the choices she's making. Two words comes to mind; sick and evil. She radiates evil. And I feel very sorry for her. 

I remember being on tour a few years ago in Minneapolis. The Dancers' Company was touring and performing in the mid-west states. We had tickets to a dance show and it seemed like it would be a very interesting performance. I am not closed-minded, and I appreciate new ideas and innovative ways of expressing ideas. However, the last number of the night started and I new I could not sit through it. I can't even recall the movement now, but I will forever remember how I felt. I felt sick. The room was dark. I had to leave. It was so evil. I almost ran out of the room. When I made it out I couldn't help breaking down into literal sobs. I felt so horrible. The rest of the company walked out as well. I will never forget that experience, and I will forever be grateful that I can recognize light. 

Something comes to mind when I think of the glamorous lives of actors, dancers, musicians, and those we "idolize" in our lives. Earthly rewards will someday be gone. I often wonder what they are living for. The approval of the world is so shallow and so fleeting compared to the approval of God. 

How often do I desire the world's approval over God's? I can't deny that I think about it. I have often wanted the praise of others. I've often wanted the world's approval of my talents. Then I remember how fleeting this life is in eternity. It will be just a moment. If only everyone knew it. 

That was quite a tangent. 

I'm going to go spend time with my family.